Just "ducked" my wedding!!

[montanaland]

Hi all-

I wanted to introduce my self and possibly get any feedback that is available.

My name is David and i reside in MT (the biggest city 130k in MT)...anyhow I was a struggling Realtor after college for about 4yrs when I met this heavy set same-age as me teacher (30) through a mutual friend who is also a teacher here in town.

I was attracted to her for her intellect and sparks that flew. After the first date I waited 2 days before calling her again>> and here panicked voice and questioning me if I was alright and she was worried that I didn't call should of been a huge red flag but to make a 3-year story short...she was DESPERATE with separation anxiety and i lived with her from get go for 3 years. After the first year she started hammering me about a ring..and her folks even joined in.

I should of never proposed to her, but she was as the point that if it didn't happen are relationship would be over. (this is 1 1/2 yrs into it) . Her dad even came into my job and asked if i had purchased the ring yet and that i should marry her?? So i proposed to her on her family planned trip to Disney world..where her own brother got on his knee the first night there and asked his 23yr old girlfriend of 2 yrs?? Then the pressure was on as her Dad came into my hotel room that night and pretty much said E (my gf) needed to be proposed to so she doesn't pout the rest of the vacation. So did it in front of the castle and her whole family the next night... and right after that I had the biggest knot in my stomach...to where she asked me if I was sure about it..after we gathered ourselves.

The next day her and here mother started demanding a date be set (the sooner the better) for the wedding. We even had a huge fight as I wouldn't commit to a date. The date was set 6 months out 7/31/09. Come 2 weeks before the date I start getting really uncomfortable..becasue I cant see myself buying into this desperate 250lb teacher..who bosses me around constantly. So I tell her I'm not walking down the Isle..and we fight and fight daily..intil the week of the weeding where I drive off to Butte, MT 250 miles away....but turn around because I'm felling guilty to face her parents at 5am the next morning. They chewed my ass for trying to leave...The next night I drove to Seattle and didn't look back.

**I thought since she has 2 masters degrees and a pending adminstrative job (75k) ..that she is a winner>>>>wrong..my life would of been a dictaded HELL.


This women was soooooo desperate to get married and my life would of been planned out weekly for the rest of my life... as she was a huge planner (a.k.a Teacher) and honey-do list advocate.



I just let it get WAY-WAY to far...and I will never do that again.

[thedude]

Welcome back to freedom.

They don't define you. You do!

[dittohd]

Man o man! It's good you finally got up the nerve to break free and get yourself out of that mess. But what about the already planned wedding? Was she stuck with all the bills? Or did you end up paying for everything?

Is she and her family still hounding you?

[rebel]

Looks like the guillotine wasn't ready for you...yet!

You will never get any closer to catastrophe than this and escape..scotfree.

Lucky you that she didn't issue a rape accusation at you.

I suggest you don't celebrate too soon... she yet might come back and haunt you.
If she was THAT desperate to get married, she must have had "special plans' for you.

Sorry to bust your bubble, but it may not be over yet. Be prepared for retaliation. She might even hit you with paternity fraud.

This story of yours happened very recently: the dust has not settled yet. Be on your guard.

From an old monkey to a young buck.

[montanaland]

Thanks for the feedback!

This past week we have had 2 face-to-face and a final phone conversation...to finally break it off.. as she doesn't want to ever hear from me again ("she states"). ..since she recognizes her own social stature in the community(h.s teacher) ...she is so embarrassed and can't believe I walked..

I haven't heard one squeak out of her family..

Her dad who also is his wifes "total" slave took most of the financial hit about $7k. Both this girls parents are professors (ph.d) and the mother is a feminist controlling Nazi from hell with a close sister who is a successful attorney I might add ...therefore I KNOW I ducked a life sentence.

I will keep my eyes open still....but Its looking yet like it will blow over......I hope.


After researching the truth on here.....I'm done with the "BIG Padonkidonk" women and their issues....South America or E. Europe here I come!!!

[systems1082]

You indeed avoided a huge (pun intended) mistake. I see your being pressured likened to sitting in an Amway seminar. Pressur Sales are this way for a reason!

Take some time to refresh, regroup, and never EVER look back (think Lot)

[khankrumthebulgar]

Last year I got the news that a former Relation. An ex Brother in Law's Brother took his life. His useless Fiend as Irlandes called her. Had driven him to despair and suicide. He was a Financial Officer for a major Healthcare Insurance provider in his state. And when I met him and his bride many years ago. I detected a strange note of narcissism in his bride. She did not want to have any children. And although she was slim and beautiful seemed very high maintenance. Trust me fellas they don't improve over time.

Realistic, Reasonable and pleasant agreeable companionship. Or time to send em packing. The pressure from her Family was reason enough to walk. And not to turn back. Obviously she did not care enough about her appearance to address her weight. She will no doubt join the Size challenged Man Haters. Who were "done wrong" by some dude.

And join the Brigade of 200+ Angry Feminist Lesbians over 250 lbs.
That Dennis the Peasant talks about in his blog. Great comedy relief. A must read. Love his snipets on AmanDuh Marcotte. LMAO. Dennis is a comedy trifecta.

That you came to your senses before Putting your head in the noose is a survival instinct. I would concur be very careful. And no make up Sex of any kind with the Ex. She could accuse you of Rape or another crime. Keep track of your whereabouts and who you are with for a while. She may come back with some vile and insane accusation.

Women do this and justify their behavior by rationalization. There is a women who admitted she was not Raped. And will not testify unless she gets immunity. The Accused has served 4 years of a 20 year Sentence and is 100% innocent. Cover your ass Bro. Women can be vindictive. When it ends they are heartless Bitches, and you are non human to her. You defied her but not marrying her. You are therefore not human and are defective. You are an Oxygen Thief to her now.

Seattle in the Pacific Northwest is a Feminist stronghold. That Montana has so many Feminists is a sad statement. That a highly rural state has FemNags is distressing to hear. My Nephew tells me that My EX Fiend is embracing Mormon Feminism. Which is a total contradiction. And complete perversion of Mormon dogma. It stands to reason since she is a Cultural Mormon, raised in the faith with little real understanding of its dogma.

Women can be vicious when crossed. She has been crossed and you are a target until she finds a replacement. She sees the 3 years she "invested in you" as a loss and a waste of "her time". You dared to get her hopes up and you dashed them. Keep distance between yourself and her. That is the safest bet you have going. And hope she finds some P Whipped Mangina raised by a Feminist Single Mom.

[dittohd]

Just to add one more comment not specifically addressed yet:

When creating a relationship with a woman, the relationship details between the both of you should be just between the two of you. This is out of respect for the privacy of the relationship and each individual within it. Plus each problem between the two of you that is mutually resolved furthers the strength of the relationship.

The moment your ex brought her parents into one of your arguments, making the odds two or three against one, you should have run for the hills immediately. This showed a complete lack of maturity on your ex's part and her total lack of confidence in her ability to resolve problems with you on her own... including her total lack of respect for the privacy dynamic within the relationship.

A big red flag and a definite deal breaker! Can you imagine your woman bringing in the cavalry every time in the future that she has a disagreement with you? Yeeeesh!

Best of luck in the future.

[montanaland]

I appreciate the great responses as they are deffinetly icing on my "do doubt" cake. I'm glad to be in your guy's company and part of such a great board.

Thanks again,

David

[andrew]

Kudos to you for having The Balls to recognize the barrel of the rifle you were facing,and doing something about it.

[rebel]

"Women can be vicious when crossed. She has been crossed and you are a target until she finds a replacement."

I know several cases where the woman found a replacement and still caused her ex countless problems.

Women will do that out of revenge. Be particularly weary if your ex-future-wife-to-be shows signs of narcissism.

Narcissism is considered a mental disease and believe me, Montana, it is a mental disease.

To all the guys here, this might be a good time to let you know that: Narcissism is a mental desease that can lead the person to even commit murder.
I have a personal friend of mine who had a narcissitic g/f. When they broke out, since she was overly aggressive, he mocked her.....

That he escaped death by a hair is not an exageration. And since she was working in the Justice system, he was unable to doanything: he was just happy she didn't hire someone to finish him off.
In short: don't mess around with narcissistic people: they can be very dangerous when their egos are devalued.

If you don't believe this, then use the Net and read about that disease.

... as if it was not enough to avoid single mothers, divorce women, women with std's, feminists... now we have to add this section: narcissistic women. And you know what?... there are more and more of them. Entitlement Princess is narcissitic.
Count them and you will see where yet another danger is coming from.

[shaazam]

"" I start getting really uncomfortable..becasue I cant see myself buying into this desperate 250lb teacher..who bosses me around constantly.""

theywere just about t fit you with a halter jahahahhahaaahahaaahhhahahaha

thnx God you were able to fit those seven league boots on in the nick of time

don't ever go near her agin cause her next trick will be to allege rape agin you

n the blue boys write down every letter of it